An Ugly Truth

I remember the scene as if it was yesterday; I had been nominated by my peers for prom queen.  I was honestly surprised by such an honor and felt quite humbled.  After votes were cast, a “friend” approached me and boldly claimed, “I didn’t vote for you.”  As my mouth dropped in shock, she continued to say, “I didn’t vote for you, because I didn’t want you to get a big head.” after this she turned and walked away.  Another time, as a young, admittedly very naive manager of a bank, one of my biggest challenges was a woman who continued to be passive aggressive in her responses to my authority.  I finally had to have a meeting, she was a pastor’s wife and I found her actions to not be in line with her profession of faith.  What came out in the discussion was that she had wanted the position and so responded in ways to make the position miserable for me.  This is an ugly truth among women.  Carolyn Custis James compares it to a fighting for the one piece of pie.  Rather than encouraging or building up our sisters, we compete, envy, gossip or derail.  What is this?  I’ve almost completed a book written by Sue Edwards & Kelley Mathews entitled, “Leading Women Who Wound.”  While I don’t agree with the dragon labeling, I do see how women can be our own worst enemies.  We observe this in tribal areas of Africa where the older women, kidnap the young women and mutilate them because it was done to them.  We see how mothers can keep their daughters behind instead of encouraging them to a better life.  What is this?  It’s not love.  What is it in women that rather than applaud, encourage and truly rejoice in another’s good fortune, we resort to such ungodly behavior?  Again, it’s not love.  We don’t like talking about this.  It makes us uncomfortable, uneasy, but every woman can testify to its effects.  Every one of us has participated to some degree.  I am among the guilty.

Galatians 5:25Galatians 5:25
English: American Standard Version (1901) - ASV
25 If we live by the Spirit, by the Spirit let us also walk.  

WP-Bible plugin & 26 reads:  Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.  Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.  1 Corinthians 13:6-81 Corinthians 13:6-8
English: American Standard Version (1901) - ASV
6 rejoiceth not in unrighteousness, but rejoiceth with the truth; ⁷ beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. ⁸ Love never faileth: but whether [there be] prophecies, they shall be done away; whether [there be] tongues, they shall cease; whether [there be] knowledge, it shall be done away.  

WP-Bible pluginb reads:  Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.  Love never fails.

To walk in the Spirit, calls me to rejoice with my sister.  It demands me to love and not envy.  It requires me to get behind and support God’s gifting instead of working in opposition.  I wonder if part of this ugly truth is due to us not knowing or valuing ourselves. Maybe we aren’t satisfied with our uniqueness or think it is somehow less than another’s.  Regardless, this truly is a disgrace to our call to love. To walk in the Spirit means to not walk in the me.  Too often I think we walk in our own worlds and compare and compete with our sisters.  It’s time to stop.  We’ve got a work to do and each one of us is called to encourage one another to do our own unique work; together.